The past week has not been great.

Last Sunday, I nailed my first 20-miler. A loop of Prospect Park, across the Manhattan Bridge, up the West Side Greenway, and a loop of Central Park — I had planned this route months ago and had been looking forward to it since stumbling upon the happy accident that this neat geographical accomplishment was almost precisely 20 miles.

My fueling was on point and I felt great for the vast majority of the run. I also saw a woman with a tiny dog off leash on Flatbush Ave, which didn't listen to commands and had no recall. If I see them again, I told myself, I'd offer to buy the dog from her. It was shocking to see such callous disregard for the dog's safety in the notoriously unpredictable main streets of Brooklyn. Anyway, besides the point.

The weather was a perfectly grey low-40s, nearly ideal conditions apart from a dose of humidity. And I got it done.

Apart from that milestone, every other outing has felt like a mill stone for the past 2 weeks.

It's the cold + the dark + the time investment of each run that is sapping my motivation. Each week has at least one weekday run over 10 miles, with last week's being 14 miles, and it's cut an imposing figure onto each week to get that done before the workday.

But, for the most part, I've kept working away at it. Each workout down is a step closer, another bale of hay into the barn, as they say.

And I never forget that I'm doing this on easy mode. I work from home, I have flexible hours & a lot of control over my calendar; I don't have kids, and as of current writing I have no persisting injuries that get in the way of my training.

The only thing really that gets in the way is myself, and it's not exactly a new phenomenon. This time of year saps my energy for all things. I carry a constant sadness for how little light there is in the day. The transition into 'evening' starts so early that I slip into 'evening-mode' and the momentum continues uninterrupted until late into the night, with no trigger to stop and transition to bed. Particularly when on PTO, as I am now, I lose track of the time, and cost myself even more hours of day by catching up on sleep the next morning. My life shifts later and later, darker and darker.

I'd like to think my current rut is due to holiday laxness, an earned respite on the year, but if I'm being honest, it's the same thing it's always been. The same seasonal pressures that get me every year, and my inability, apparently, to counteract them effectively. I need to do better.

Well, with that, here's my week. A recovery week, which feels both merciful and unearned. I haven't even mentioned it yet, somehow — I guess it feels like a small detail compared to the mental game — but I missed two runs this weekend, including my long one. My right knee started showing some pangs starting mid-week last week, and it felt sharp as I got started on my easy Saturday run. So I called it quits early on Saturday, and called off Sunday's planned 16-miler with 12 @ MP.

I assume it's my shoes wearing down - the Kayanos are over 300 miles, and the Tempus are closing in on 300. It's a bit early in their life, feels like, but the signs are there. I pulled out my next pair of Kayanos to try them on and start the break-in process, and it was stunning how firm their sides were, how fitted the felt, and how bouncy compared to the older ones. I don't think I'm pulling the plug on the older shoes too soon, but I am a bit disappointed by their breaking down on the early end. Cut my run short today by 1.5 miles (did 6.5 out of 8) due to some foot pain, but I'll take no knee pain as a good sign!

Anyway, the week:

Monday: Rest

Tuesday: 8 Miles

Wednesday: 8 Miles w/ 5x800m @ 5k pace

Thursday: 5 Miles Recovery

Friday: Rest

Saturday: 8 Miles w/ 6x10 Hill Sprints & 8x100m Strides (Also volunteering at the Joe K 10k in Central Park that morning, yikes!)

Sunday: 14 Miles

Then we get into the final week of the second block of the plan. After that comes the "Race Preparation" block, which brings a focus on dress-rehearsal races and speed work, all while maintaining 50-55 mile weeks.

Let's fuckin go.

Dec 29, 2023, Red Hook