I need to steal a little of last week's confidence as I approach tomorrow.

The plan is 16 miles, with 10 at Marathon Pace. I'm still figuring that out, but I've been able to maintain this workout with MP in the 8:45/mi range, so that's what I'm going for again, at least on the longer, flatter sections. I've fallen into a repeatable habit of doing my long runs in and around the 3 bridges between Brooklyn and Manhattan, all of which include a good 1/2 mile of incline. They feel super productive, though I'm always disappointed on the downhills! They're so long, it feels like cheaping out; I've been surprised at needing just as much of a 'mantra' during these descents as on the ascents:

This is still training.

This is training for downhills.

Downhills are also training.

It's not wrong; different parts of the body are stressed, and for Napa I'll need both. Though if I'm completely honest, in the easy comfort of my apartment, I'm feeling some kind of way about the choice to prioritize a race with a net elevation loss. There's already the ghost of an asterisk forming on this marathon. Yeah you finished, but who wouldn't?

This is a ridiculous thought to have now — Napa was always meant to be, effectively, part of the training for NYC. It's hard not to lose sight of that now that my attention is 100% on Napa. I'm happy with this as a goal, and what makes me happy is that it's a stepping stone. An intermediate goal. There's already something to follow.

That, plus the fatalistic undercurrent that accompanies signing up for any marathon: you only get to do so many of these, if any at all.

I want, if I end up enjoying the distance and can get through 2024 without serious injury, to allow myself as many of these experiences as I can. If I were, hypothetically, to do 1 marathon a year for the rest of my able-bodied life, that sounds like a freakily small number even in the best case scenario of 5 or 6 more decades.

It's still to be seen whether I enjoy this, or, better-said, whether I get what I need out of it to want to continue doing them. I'm cautious of sounding like I'm over-committing to a lifestlye that I've barely touched. But It I do get what I need, and if I do commit, I feel as if I owe it to myself to set up for at least one additional race at the start here.

That was, earnestly, a significant portion of my reason for seeking out a race and registering. I would put the reasons in order of influences as:

  1. Anxiety about being ready for NYC 2024
  2. A hedge against "regretting not having done more marathons in my life if I end up liking them"
  3. November 2024 being SO FAR
  4. Existential angst, misc. sources

Pictured: Existential angst (misc. sources)

I intended to write about the change in temperature this week; the pros and cons of winter running (pro: tights, con: frozen eyeballs), but I suppose it's consistent. The weather turned around again from the mid-30s to the mid-50s, which is throwing my carefully-balanced seasonal clothing storage system into complete disarray.

Anyway, I'll be fighting the rain tomorrow on each of those 16 miles, but I can look forward to having the route all to myself.

Dec 02, 2023 3:00pm, 1 Mile into 5 Recovery Miles